Observing Communication

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As I was working one day,  One of the assistants was reprimanding one of the children for pushing another child.  The child was crying and screaming the assistant was getting loud and pointing. 

I started to think how do I handle situations like this.  First I remove the child from the situation and tell them it is time for a break.  I have the child sit on a bench and sit next to them to be on their level.  Once  they child is calm I ask them do you think pushing our friends is a good choice or bad choice.  Asking a very direct question with an answer they need to provide.    Then I ask them what made you push them,  sometimes to find out they thought it was part of the game, sometimes because the other child wasn't playing what they wanted to play.  We then engage in a discussion to see how we can do things better,  I do give the child time to think and respond.  I find this method does end up with better results.    We have a mutual respect for eachother.

Being able to keep patience in the situations is very hard.  Our instincts are to react and discipline.  It took me years of practice to be able to conduct myself in this manor Occasionally I fall in the trap and have to catch myself and redirect myself in order to have a more positive interaction. 

Comments

  1. Jennifer JohnsonMay 27, 2018 at 5:33 PM

    Stephanie,
    Excellent example for your observation between an adult and a child. Working in a childcare center, this happens more often than I would like to admit. We are always solving problems between children who are not playing nicely with their friends. The way we react and redirect is so important. I do not believe that yelling and screaming is the answer. I usually remove both the children from the activity and redirect them after we have calmed down and solved the problem. I like how you said to get down on the child's level. I think that is so important because otherwise it looks like they have no control of the situation and it makes us look so much bigger than the child. If we get down on their level and talk calmly, we can usually help solve the problem effectively. I do sometimes fall into the trap of yelling and I have to step back and redirect myself as well. I like that you said that. It happens, we are human. Good job, thank you for sharing your thoughts with us.
    Jennifer

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